i wasn’t the first pick for the Wheeler Avenue Baptist Church Good Friday service. and, that’s okay with me.
when i initially received the invitation, i was elated because i love this church. i love the people who lead and serve there, and i have fond memories of preaching there several years ago. even though i wouldn’t physically enter the building, i was still grateful to share in the fellowship.
when i saw who else was on the roster for Good Friday, i grew nervous. when i accepted the invitation, i didn’t realize that i was accepting an invitation to a career highlight. i discovered that i would be preaching amongst some of the women who have deeply inspired my ministry, shaped me for ministry. these were the women i grew up listening to when they and my Pastor would preach together. these women were my original models of what it could look like to be a Black woman who proclaims. and i would be be preaching with them. i will always see myself as indebted to these women. how is this happening, i thought.
my thought was confirmed when a colleague texted to ask me, “how did you get this invitation?” jarring and offensive, yes. i don’t know that i’ve ever “done” anything for a preaching invitation, because i’ve always believed that if i do my best, my gifts will continue to make room for me. that’s Bible! however, the question was also provocative. in the way that i tend to do, i sat and i thought. i tried to put the puzzle together.
i realized that these were my pastor’s friends. very quickly, i texted her to thank her, “just in case she had anything to do with my participation in the service.” when she responded, i was immediately overcome with gratitude.
she explained that she had been invited, but had to decline. she did not mention my name to the organizing pastor. “The Spirit spoke your name,” she said. i realized, once again, that the invitations and opportunities that are for me, are for me. When Spirit speaks my name, I am summoned to speak a Word. i take great comfort in this, as it underscores my belief that I don’t have to hustle, bribe, beg, or otherwise compromise my integrity to stand on any stage. my one act of faithfulness is to stay prayerful and prepared.
i also felt gratitude that the Spirit spoke my name in the place of my spiritual mother. its’s an honor to stand in the place of the one who made my ministry possible, by her witness, her model, her mentorship, and her blessing. i could never fill her shoes, but i thank that this is a part of what it means to follow in her footsteps.
truthfully, it’s not the first time that i wasn’t the first choice for a position or an opportunity. but, i’ve learned that it doesn’t matter. when the Spirit speaks your name, and when you are God’s choice, the moment will not evade you. it will come straight to you.
your only job is to be ready when it arrives.
a blessing:
may you always trust that what is for you, is, indeed, for you.
may you always meet your moments with grace.
may you always trust in the One who is always speaking your name.
aśe.